Verizon Customer Dick Cheney Slams Obama’s Phone Spying

Jun 06, 2013

083011_hannity_dick_FNC_083011_21-11Dick Cheney blasted President Obama today over the NSA's secret surveillance program targeting all Verizon Wireless users.

In an interview with Fox News, the former vice president and longtime Verizon customer expressed sheer outrage that his calls are being monitored.

"I don't know who these people think they are," Cheney told Fox and Friends' host Steve Doocy. "The absolute nerve to go snooping around everybody's private phone conversations. It's unbelievable.

"Since when did having a cellular telephone become probable cause to spy on someone? And what other data do they have? Our GPS locations? Which internet sites we go to?

"Like most Americans, I've got a lot of things on my phone that I consider private - not the least of which is my browsing history. This an an outrage, an absolute outrage."

The Dark Side

While serving as vice president from 2001 to 2009, Dick Cheney was a tireless advocate of increased government surveillance. He was especially adamant in defending the NSA's warrantless wiretapping program.

He has also had a long history, however, of changing his political positions when the consequences personally affect him, most notably reversing his opposition to gay marriage when his daughter came out as gay.

It appears that today's news that the Obama Administration had been secretly monitoring his and every other Verizon customer's activities hit too close to home.

"I've been with Verizon for fifteen years," he exclaimed, "and this is how they treat their loyal customers? Just hand over our data to the U.S. government, no questions asked?

"The idea of some pimply-faced NSA analyst finding out about my love for Jezebel, TMZ and those little knitting stores on Etsy just makes me sick. I thought this was still America. I thought I still had rights.

"Its almost like this Obama character thinks the rule of law doesn't apply to him. He thinks he can use the fear of terrorism to justify any sort of government intrusion he wants. It's terrifying."

A spokesperson for Cheney says he is considering legal action against the Obama administration.

  • Robert

    Irony, anyone?

  • vito33

    Good one, Currant.

  • Ron Harrell

    Ironic & Hypocritical

  • timmeister54

    I’m confused. He helps create The Patriot Act. Now he helps villify The Patriot Act?! Can you sing: “I can see clearly now, his brain is gone…”?!

  • Tolin Jonese

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  • sari

    This is a satirical website.

  • DEACON54

    This ex VP is a non stop LIAR. Who started this warrantless tapping? Cheney has started a overwhelming hidden grasp of our rights, and now he feels like he is being taken, good!!

  • tedmeister

    When Cheney was VP they did not target any and all Americans, they targeted calls going to (and coming from) countries overseas that were known for terrorist activity (which Obama vehemently opposed btw). A huge difference from what’s going on now, spying on EVERYone. Of course Cheney has cause to be mad! All Verizon customers should be.

  • Tim

    Cheney’s a scumbag and both him and Obama should be tried as war criminals.

    Being for gay marriage because his daugher is gay, though, is less of a flip-flop than Obama switching to being for gay marriage months before an election, or Hillary after the election while eyeing the presidency. Many liberals praised them as Rosa Parks for their flip-flops.

  • Tim

    Obama attacked Bush for the Patriot Act as a Senator but chose it’s writer as VP and now strongly supports it. There’s hypocrisy on both sides and him and those excusing him are hypocrites.