Following Bill Clinton's powerful 48 minute speech at the Democratic National Convention, a surprising new poll shows the former U.S. president now running third in the presidental race behind frontrunners Barack Obama and Mitt Romney.

The TDC Opnion Research survey done overnight now puts President Obama at 42%, Mitt Romney at 40% and newcomer Bill Clinton at 18% - despite the fact that Clinton is not running for office and has endorsed President Obama.... Read More →


Canadian singer and tween heartthrob Justin Bieber is recovering at a Los Angeles area hospital today after being transported by ambulance from his Beverly Hills home.

Initial reports indicate that the 18 year old megastar was incapacitated by a panic attack following the shock of having his first erection.

A call to 911 from the Bieber residence was placed at 10:37pm PST yesterday evening.

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Continuing his unconventional campaign for a U.S. Senate seat, Missouri Congressman Todd Akin has agreed to debate world renown science educator Bill Nye, saying he wants to "destroy once and for all the myth of the Darwinist monkey god."

Last week Akin claimed that Hurricane Isaac was god's punishment for Bill Nye's denial of creationsim. Nye responded by challenging Akin to a science debate during a live television interview.

Today in a press conference on the steps of an the Saint Louis Science Center  Akin accepted Nye's challenge and offered a debate on all matters scientific.... Read More →


Last Thursday Americans were stunned when Hollywood legend Clint Eastwood took to the stage at the Republican National Convention and conducted an unrehearsed interview with an empty chair representing President Obama.

The 12 minute rambling, incoherent address was the warm-up act for Mitt Romney's nomination acceptance speech and broadcast live on all major American television networks.

Although conceived as a way to inject a dose of star-power to the otherwise sedate convention, reaction to the speech has been negative with most pundits and commentors calling the episode "bizarre", "strange", and "baffling".... Read More →


Bill Nye Todd AkinBill Nye may still be The Science Guy, but he's no longer Mr. Nice Guy.

During a live interview this morning with the Smithsonian Channel, the mild mannered science educator unloaded on U.S. Congressman Todd Akin, calling him "a fucking idiot" for accusing Nye of personally provoking Hurricane Issac.

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Missouri U.S. Senate candidate Todd Akin has deepened the controversy surrounding his candidacy today by claiming that science educator Bill Nye is to blame for Hurricane Issac - the deadly storm currently menacing New Orleans.

Akin - who has already attracted outrage with recent statements regarding rape and homosexuality - says that Nye has angered god with a Youtube video in which he claims creationism "hurts kids."... Read More →


Missouri U.S. senate candidate Todd Akin has stoked more outrage today by claiming that male homosexuality is a disease and that the medical establishment has found the cure.

The Republican congressman, already under fire for his controversial comments regarding rape, told a reporter for Cape Giradeau's KBSI 23 News that "female breastmilk - when fed directly to an adult homosexual male daily for at least four weeks - has a 94% chance of permanently curing homosexual perversions."... Read More →


RomneyToday U.S. Republican Presidential candidate Mitt Romney fired back at critics of his plan to spin-off America's largest state by area into a private investment vehicle run by large multinational corporations, saying in an interview on Fox News that the county needed "bold, private sector solutions" to its pressing fiscal problems

News of the confidential plan to strip Alaska of its sovereignty and sell it to the highest bidder leaked to the press this week when a key Romney aide accidentally emailed a campaign white paper entitled "Alaska: 50 Million Shades of Gold"  to a journalist working for the Anchorage Daily News.

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Glenn Beck - the conservative American talk show host and former alcoholic morning radio clown - has introduced a new product which promises to revolutionize the U.S. home Muslim detection market.

For the low, low price of only 4 payments of $199 Glenn Beck fans can now buy their own personal gold-plated Muslim detector, which Beck describes as "the ultimate jihad-aversion device for freedom-loving, god-fearing Americans."... Read More →


In the U.S. capitol of Washington, D.C. today American liberals gathered in one of their country's most sacred monuments - the Thomas Jefferson Memorial - to celebrate America's independence with a traditional flag burning ceremony followed by a public gay orgy and a ceremonial live condom demonstration at the foot of a giant statue of the U.S.'s third president.

Organizers of the event say that turnout is expected to reach a record 35,000 people this year as liberals and progressives from around the country turn off MSNBC and tune into NPR as they drive in their Volkswagen vans to meet others who share their perverted godless worldview.... Read More →


Former U.S. presidential candidate Rick Santorum has issued a statement claiming that he didn't know what the gay dating app he downloaded to his iPhone was for when he downloaded it.

The 51 year old former senator from the state of Pennsylvania was caught Friday when during an interview with a reporter he took out his iPhone to answer an emergency call from his wife.... Read More →


Penn State Sandusky

Penn State University, a world-leading academic institution in the U.S. state of Pennsylvania, announced today the creation of a committee to consider a temporary hiring freeze on all potential employees with a criminal record of child sex abuse.

The bold move comes less than a week after one of its longtime former employees - former football coach Jerry Sandusky - was found guilty on 45 counts of sexually abusing minors over the course of a 20 year period.... Read More →