Politics

Obamacare Death Panel Orders First Execution

Jan 20, 2014
86-Year-Old Diabetic Grandmother to Face Firing Squad
Obamacare Death Panel

Photo : Getty Images iStock

The death panels set up under Obamacare ordered their first execution today.

At a hearing this morning in Chicago, the president's Patient Resource Efficiency Board (PREB) ruled that 86-year-old Dorthy Zborknak has outlived her usefulness and sentenced her to death by firing squad.

Zborknak, a grandmother of four, had worked at Fleur de Lis Florist on the city's North Side for 40 years before retiring in 1998. Since then she has struggled with diabetes, high blood pressure and kidney failure.

"Unfortunately the cost of her care just became too expensive," says Peter Johnston, a member of the Chicago PREB who voted to kill the woman. "Her diabetes medicine alone costs the taxpayers thousands each month. And in a few years she'll need a new kidney.

"Kidney transplants can run into the hundreds of thousands of dollars. Bullets only cost a few cents apiece. Under the Affordable Care Act, we have the power to make choices about end of life care and I stand by our ruling.

"I know it will be hard for the family to accept what's going to happen. It will be a rough few days emotionally. But from a financial standpoint, this was a very easy decision."

Claim Denied

Death panels have always been one of the more controversial parts of Obamacare. First noticed by health care policy expert Sarah Palin, the unelected "efficiency boards" allow the government to kill anyone they deem too costly to insure.

Conservative groups bravely warned against the dangers of the system, decrying both its lack of accountability and the immorality of killing senior citizens to save money.

Tea Party leaders such as Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas and Sen. Mike Lee of Utah led an effort late last year to defund Obamacare and stop the death panels once and for all.

Unfortunately their efforts weren't enough to save Zborknak, an active member of her local knitting club who would have celebrated her 87th birthday next month.

In the coming days a team of FBI agents will escort her to the execution site in Springfield, where she will be shot by a group of federal agents. The government promises the process will be as humane as possible.

"It will be quick and painless," Johnston assures. "We're planning on doing around 20,000 of these a year so speed and efficiency are critical."

For her part, Palin has vowed to continue fighting the practice. In a Facebook post this morning she lambasted the Obama administration for its actions and gloated that her prediction had come true.

"Dear liberals I TOLD you this would happen. When Obama said 'If you like your grandmother, you can keep her,' did you really trust him?" she wrote.

  • captain_pudding

    Good, get rid of all those leaching from Obamacare!!!

  • FuckYOUyankinbluejeans

    THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!

    I saw this on m,y facebook and am just disgusted FUCK OBAMA!

  • Joe Khul

    “Heath care policy expert - Sarah Palin” LOL

  • I Am God

    Are you seriously that gullible? You do know that this is just a satire page, right?

  • larry longmore

    If he is not serious maybe he has a medical condition that should be reviewed by PREB!

  • Milton of the mountains

    Will she be given a cigarette and some booze before the execution?

  • Mackenzie Grosvenor

    Agreed! I am very saddened by what the government is choosing to do.

  • Last Resort

    Ha! Ha!!! You’re dumb. I wish there was a death panel for stupid a-holes.

  • Dri

    Effin hiLARIous!

  • terrymofmich

    You sir are an amazing idiot !

  • MrSwingGuitar

    While there’s a limit to human intelligence, a couple of the posts below prove that there’s NO limit to human stupidity.

  • seraphimblade

    Now, how many people won’t know that this is satire?

  • seraphimblade

    Please tell me you’re either joking or trolling.

    Unfortunately, there are plenty of people out there who WOULD believe this.

  • Daniel 3-19

    Now I understand why the government bought billions of rounds of hollow point ammunition….

  • Lance Grant

    Rose Nylund is NEXT!!! Muahahahaha

  • Ricky Gilliland

    They actually wrote and posted this? Really? Wow. Talk about trashing journalists.

  • LeAnne

    No way… have you seen the cost of cigarettes lately???

  • morrow2

    This one is a satire but I have already told my son not to be surprised when they “put me to sleep” after they decide it is costing too much to keep me alive. Laugh now but later on it won’t be so funny. I believe with all my heart this is where we are headed - not a firing squad but simply a refusal to “waste” the money on us and we will receive our death sentence and simply die without any treatment.

  • Guest

    She is far more of an expert than any Democrat because she actually read the bill…..Not to mention she is STILL more qualified to be preseident than Obama.

  • Skip

    She is far more of an expert than any Democrat because she actually read
    the bill…..Not to mention she is STILL more qualified to be president than Obama.

  • Skip

    Satire for now…..give it about 2 or 3 more years….

  • seraphimblade

    You do know that you’re the reason such satires can be written in the first place?

    You all were saying that 2 or 3 years ago when PPACA was first passed. “Just wait until it gets implemented, you’ll see the death panels then!” Hrm, implemented, no death panels. Now the prediction is another few years in the future.

    You’re just like every doomsday charlatan that ever was. If the apocalypse doesn’t come, you couldn’t have been WRONG, you were just a little early. It’ll come in another little while.

    Riiiiiiiiiiiight. Doomsday is not coming, and neither are the “death panels”. They never were.

  • biggen

    The only shooting that needs to occur is in between the eyes of any idiots who think Sarah Palin has anything relevant to say. Let’s start with this guy above me.

  • Heinz Hulden

    Did you know that a highly qualified scientific committee recently established the lowest measurable unit of intelligence and called it 1 Palin. A mosquito registers at about 5 Palin.

  • Rancer Huntington

    this is dumb and not going to happen,but lets keep our money in the USA and leave everyone alone and take care of the people here and we would have plenty of money.

  • mwmcfalls

    Hmmm, wonder how many Palins the jackasses that keep posting this on Facebook as a true story have? Can you have .5?

  • mwmcfalls

    0.2 Palin. See below. LOL!!!!!

  • mwmcfalls

    0.1 Palins. See below LOL!!!! Can this person read well enough to vote? scary…..

  • PietSmit

    tricky thing is, when young people refuse to pay insurance (which is a safety net for the days to come), this WILL be the outcome…

  • Matthew Kansas

    You have got to be one of the biggest idiots around. You do realize that Americans are living longer and longer because of all the advances in medicine. Why the fuck would they even bother to find ways to save people if their end goal is to put you to sleep. Jesus Christ, get a brain.

  • Bkwcomments

    They don’t even let you pick your last meal anymore!

  • Bkwcomments

    First we need to get rid of all the idiots who read, believe, and share as truth anything they read from The Daily Currant or The Onion. It’s bad enough they believe the crap on Fox but THIS?

  • William Harper

    So now your son knows about your “condition”. You should be ashamed for the stress you have caused.

  • William Harper

    Please don’t - they are fun to play with. If someone you know re-post something from here then you know they are game. Move stuff around in their house, install fake video cameras around their work place, get someone to wear a trench coat and sunglasses then follow them around Walmart…the

    possibilities are endless.

  • Incriminaughty

    Besides smoking can kill you.

  • Incriminaughty

    That’s pretty harsh considering given that it’s posed as a contrary position to a president that commands no respect anywhere he goes.

    That is if we assume we can’t account for all the azzdouches, dips-hits and dumbphucks that actually bought the con he put on them.

  • captain_pudding

    Is it hard . . . living in a world without humour?

  • captain_pudding

    I get a large amount of my entertainment from idiots believing satire/fox news.

  • Sally la Marche

    She can read?

  • Carol

    What’s the difference between Sarah Palin’s mouth and her vagina? Only one retarded thing has come out of her vagina.

  • eelet

    Today satire, tomorrow for real.

  • texasaggie

    You’ll notice that now that insurance companies can no longer refuse coverage for people whose medical problems are too expensive, the death panels have gone out of business. The only one still semifunctional is in AZ where the Jan Brewer refused to authorize organ transplants for Medicaid people.

  • ullzor

    y right, take a look at Europe fagface

  • Miss Diane

    You being a woman ( ?) I cant believe that you could say such a nasty remark !

  • Miss Diane

    In a few years all they have to do is deny grandma her medication because she is a drain on society. That is what hitler did to the mentally ill, and then at the camps. The old and infirmed were expendable. They might not have shooting squads in the future, but there are other ways to kill people.

  • csmif

    when these pop up on facebook, WITHOUT FAIL, there are always a few who respond thinking currant posts are real. every single time.

  • David Rosenthal

    Rationing of care is here. You will be shocked to realize how little you knew when making your confident statements. But apart from rationing, ACA gives the government free acess, under law, to your bank accounts. Have a nice day.

  • Corey James

    Rationing of care has ALWAYS existed under private insurance. Perhaps you should pull your head out of that dark, stinky place it is buried and have a look around at the real world.

    Get your facts straight, David.

    Have a nice day.

  • Corey James

    I can see Sarah Palin giving the State of the Union speech from the text written all over her palms, arms, breasts……..

    GMAFB, Skip. You need some serious deprogramming if you think Sarah Palin is qualified to do anything more than drop fries at Mickey D’s.

  • bobe123

    That’s terrible.

  • bobe123

    Only idiot young people don’t have health insurance. I had a skiing accident when I was 29, thank god my parents imparted the good sense to buy health insurance even though I was self employed and had to pay 100% out of my own pocket. The knee operation plus therapy came in at just under $15k way back in 1983, yet it only cost me $500 under my copay. Without the insurance the accident would have bankrupted me. Now Imagine how much that would cost today. And away from my own experience, millions of people under 30 either have heart attacks or are diagnosed with cancer, diabetes, etc every year, the occurrence of which is completely unexpected. The cost of any of these can easily run exceed $100k.

  • Beorn

    Let’s assume you’re retired, married, and haven’t purchased nursing home insurance. IF you need Medicaid to pay for the nursing home you have to show that you have assets BELOW a certain amount to QUALIFY. That’s been true BEFORE anyone even heard about the ACA. Are you talking about that???

  • hahah

    ahahah i l0ve this page

  • http://stonesnbones.blogspot.com/ Dr. GS Hurd

    That didn’t make me laugh.

  • Sean T Gallagher

    skip You are an idiot in need of some thing ,not sure what

  • Sean T Gallagher

    leave skip alone he is a member of his own death panel ..I am sorry to inform you all here that my best friend SKIP is terminal ,yes that is what I have said .skip is terminally stupid and his brain will be leaving us for the great beyond very soon

  • Cheyenne

    The stupid is strong with this one!

  • clayton griffith

    It is satire. If it were real it wouldn’t be a firing squad. I can imagine the would make it quick and silent like a well executed inside mob hit. It would be blamed on some gun nut. I mean why not get two birds with one stone. Even if one of the birds is an old bird.

  • musikfanat22

    you are obtuse to the point of cretinism…

  • musikfanat22

    Uh, the govt. has always had access to ALL bank accounts-that’s how they find tax cheats, except for people like your boy mutt robme…

  • musikfanat22

    Hey, stupid! It’s a JOKE!!!

  • Valerie Nellor

    Such ignorance in this country is clearly a fault of poor educational opportunities. http://www.snopes.com/politics/medical/over75.asp

  • Brian Hughes

    “Such ignorance in this country is clearly a fault of poor educational opportunities.”

    Boy, the irony there just drips right off the page …

  • billy miller

    This is to get you conditioned on this type of news.

  • Carol Ann Hunigan Booher

    that is the stupidest comment yet… lol.. this is 7 months later and I have Blue Cross through ACA just like I had it though my job when I worked before I got sick, it did not access my bank then and it is not accessing it now. jeeeeezzee idiot

  • http://jrcministries.org/ John Everette Russell

    I contacted the FBI to verify if this is true or a lie. Actually, we have murdered 57 million innocent, helpless human beings since 1973. About 57 million people died as a result of WWII. Communist dictators have murdered

  • http://jrcministries.org/ John Everette Russell

    I am retired military and my wife is in a skilled nursing facility. She has Medicare parts A, B and D; TRICARE FOR LIFE and Medicaid. Missouri allowed my wife and me to split our retirement income to avoid bankruptcy, for which we are thankful. The state allows us to jointly own our home and one vehicle. They have an option to place a second mortgage on our home. They know how much money we have in the bank and have set a limit on it.

    Dr. John E. Russell
    Chaplain (COL) AUS, Retired
    Vietnam, 1969

    PS: A skilled nursing home can cost a resident an estimated $50,000 per year and that type of home care can cost $100,000 per year. A skilled nursing home provides LPNs, RNs and CNAs 24/7. They do not provide prescription drugs, but do provide three meals and snacks per day.

  • Laron Woods

    Carol, that is such a cruel thing to say. It puts you in the category of “the lowest of the low”.

  • omega2

    MR. JOHNSTON PLEASE STEP UP AND BE THE FIRST TO GO AS YOU ARE A TOTAL USLESS PIECE OF TRASH IN CHICAGO THAT NEEDS INCINERATING! IN ANY CASE RIGHT OR WRONG BE OUR GUEST!

  • stonemike

    Who really cares , the basic premise is true! But it will never effect any of the ‘hierarchy” of “global socialism”, they are too valuable to lose and besides they have stolen enough money from tax payers to be ‘uber wealthy and buy good healthcare !

  • Carol Lee Brown

    Like the euthanasia scene with G Robertson in Soylent Green…if you didn’t see the movie, you can probably Google the scene. Very “now” thinking.

  • Joseph Spicer

    your a jerk!!

  • Joseph Spicer

    you are sick also!

  • jrm55

    Who cares if it’s satire. Obama is costing us trillions… Take him to a firing squad and be done with him!

  • Burly Bergeron

    Just like articles from “The Onion”—FAKE

  • mysticmaggie

    Sorry, but I’m not laughing. Have already discovered if you take someone to the emergency room and they have to be admitted, you’d better check whether it is marked ‘Admission’ or ‘Observation’, if a person is under only Medicare. If it is marked Observation, the patient is responsible for EVERY RED CENT and if they need further help in recovering, they may not qualify if they were under Observation while in the hospital. People with broken bones, who are too elderly to take care of themselves are being slapped with this far too often because Medicare doesn’t exactly announce it. And these folks are being sent home still in horrible condition, still unable to care for themselves, and buried in debt. Very funny, hahahaha, right? And if you elderly, you aren’t exactly moved up the list for donors at top speed because the system now figures younger needs it more than older.

  • John Peters

    Really?

    Health care has ALWAYS been rationed…this is absolutely nothing new. How it’s rationed, who gets it, the qualifications for it have changed some, but health care has always been rationed, with people literally dying in modern America from infected teeth and relatively minor conditions because they had no access to affordable healthcare.

    What a joke — healthcare is NOW rationed. Geeze, I have to wonder where some people have been.

  • John Peters

    And for the record, even before the ACA, your healthcare decisions were never made by you and your doctor based on the best course of treatment. Your healthcare decisions were made by your insurance company based on the company’s determination of what is a good financial investment (cost of the treatment vs. the treatment’s likely rate of success to keep you alive and healthy enough to keep paying premiums).

    Your comfort, your health, your life had virtually nothing to do with the decision. All based on some chart or table or guideline some insurances guys put together based on number-crunching.

  • David Rosenthal

    Government always had free access to your bank account because of the laws regarding health insurance? Not so. Government panels got to decide who got what until a given age? Not so. Death panels are here, now.

  • Kilkee

    If by “free access to your bank accounts” you mean the government can compel you by legal process to pay something, that has been true for 200+ years. And is true of your fellow citizens, who can sue you and obtain process to levy against your accounts. That’s it?

  • David Rosenthal

    I guess you would have no objection to slavery of it were legal, as it once was, under the Constitution. Let me know how it works out for you when you have no funds in your account because the legal process moved forward.

  • DaveG

    David, please provide proof of that statement. I have health care through the affordable care act and never had to give the government my bank account information.

  • Walternator

    Ridiculous man.

  • Caniac Steve Henderson

    i had a good laugh at this…but the panel that will decide what gets funded/paid is a reality..now just how many people were selected to be on that panel..is another story…

  • Bill Morgan

    This is in incredibly poor taste, even for a pack of brainless liberals. Medicare is, in fact, implementing Obummercare requirements and denying costly treatment to many of the elderly. A former classmate of mine has been battling for his wife’s parents for more than a year because Medicare wants to provide only “end of life counseling” and/or hospice care. By the time most of the idiots who voted for the muzlim-in-chief are old enough to be affected it will be standard operating procedure to turn the old and ill out into the blizzard and let them die of exposure.

  • Wayne McIntosh

    That is a flat out lie…if you have an infection just go to the ER and they have to treat you regardless of your ability to pay, they even post signs saying just that! There has always been healthcare for everyone…tax payers had to foot the bill for those that couldn’t pay!

  • John Peters

    No, what I said is truth. Health care has always been rationed. Yes, you can go to the ER, but ONLY if it is a hospital which receives federal funding. Those hospitals are required to offer service, others are not.

    And even then, you’re hit with a $500 ER charge, plus doctor and other fees — if you have insurance, they usually charge you less because the insurance company has negotiated a lower payment scale, but if you don’t, you get socked big-time.

    If you can’t pay, hospitals generally garnish your wages, put liens on your bank accounts/property (car, home, etc.), anything you have they can use to get payment

    Had you been able to go to a regular doctor, pay maybe a $50 office charge plus buy the medication needed, you could have avoided all of this. But, they require payment up front. If you don’t have insurance, and you’re already living paycheck to paycheck (which a significant portion of Americans are), then you don’t have the extra $50 and you hold out and hope you’ll get better, or that you can make it to your next payday to be able to afford to go to the doctor.

    Even if you can hold out until next payday, you call for an appointment — if you’re a regular patient, you probably only have to wait a couple of days to get in. If you’re not a regular patient, it could be two weeks or more before you can get in, if at all — many doctor’s offices simply don’t take new patients.

    Because it’s unlikely you can hold out until next payday, or you can’t get into the doctor’s office within a reasonable time, you end up in the ER. And then they charge you 10 to 15 times what it would have cost to have seen a regular doctor. And they come after you in court to get the money, and if your assets are such that they can’t get the money, then the hospital recoups that money by charging even more to other patients (not taxpayers — don’t know what you’re talking about there).

    And guess what? Those with insurance get lower charges from ERs because of negotiated fees, so those without insurance bear the brunt of these additional charges passed on because of those who can’t pay.

    The idea that there’s always been healthcare for everyone is laughable, and shows a gross detachment from the real world.

    This doesn’t even touch on how many are diagnosed with terminal cancer
    and other conditions that would have been arrested and even cured had
    they been caught earlier, or cases in which basic care (i.e., an infected tooth — which hospital ERs by and large will NOT treat) can lead to heart conditions, blood infections, and even death because basic simple care wasn’t available.

    Healthcare is and has been rationed for decades, and in one of the most inefficient manners possible in the U.S., with those on the lower end of income scales doing without while those in the middle and upper end of the income scales seemingly having a limitless access to healthcare.

  • Lisa Jolley White

    she is better than Obama any day

  • Pthew2U

    Still going strong: people on FB TODAY thinking that this woman was “put to sleep” by obamacare.

  • Irene Elizabeth Grooms

    I believe what SARAH PALIN SAID IS THE TRUTH.

  • GeoffZoref
  • marihia

    There is a difference between rationing and out right denial, if a senior citizens needs an expensive procedure, guess you don’t remember when limpd-k, said……” IF A SENIOR CITIZEN NEEDS AN EXPENSIVE PROCEDURE……..TAKE A PAIN PILL”!!!!

  • http://www.virtual-copy.com/ JC Torpey

    You’re right, but its been here all along, not started under the ACA. Its called an HMO.

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