Sport

Derrick Rose Retires At Age 26 After Eczema Diagnosis

Nov 23, 2014

roseeczemaFormer Chicago Bulls 2008 first round draft pick Derrick Rose has retired from the National Basketball League (NBA) due to a recent eczema diagnosis.

“My skin becomes a little irritated and I can’t play no more. I want my skin looking good when I’m in my kids’ graduation photos and making a business presentation,” Rose told CSN Chicago’s Dave Kaplan. “How am I suppose to play ball when I’m itchy?”

Doctors say the skin disorder is caused by his sweat. This was the final straw to the plagued all-star point guard’s career when the intense itching became too much to hide.

The news shocked Bulls fans who have only seen the 2011 NBA rookie of the year play 26 games in the past three years. After two knee surgeries and numerous small ailments, the once famed scorer decided the future risk of playing basketball was not worth the risk.

Rose explained, “I’m just being smart about my health. I think the skin is the most important organ you got. It covers your whole body and keeps everything inside.

“I’ve accomplished everything I’ve wanted to in basketball. I’m a businessman now.”

Rose’s made over $150 million from his Bulls playing contract and endorsements, most notably from Adidas who gave the then 23-year-old a 10-year, $250-million shoe deal.

“With the ‘couple hundred mil’ I‘ve made over the past few years, I know I can turn that into a ‘couple hundred bil,’ ” Rose said. “I’ve been thinking of this frozen yogurt franchise where the customer pours his own ice cream. It’s going to be huge.

“Man, I loved going for frozen yogurt as a kid. We’d go up to State Street to Bob’s Yogurt Stand and get a scoop of any flavor we wanted. It was my dream to be a frozen yogurt man. I mean, basketball was okay but I love frozen yogurt.”

Rose, a family man, is looking forward to what’s best for his family: “I want my kids growing up knowing their dad is the greatest businessman he can be. In order to do that I need my skin to be looking good. Can’t be scratching around and looking flaky.

I don’t care how many meetings I have to sit through. So long as they have ice packs, I can sit all day. I’ve had a lot of practice over the past few years by sitting on the bench.

“My life after basketball is finally starting and I’m very excited. Stayed tuned for Rose’s Frozen Yogurt Stand. Got a space at Water Tower Place. Can you believe a kid from the South Side of Chicago could grow up and one day own his own store on Michigan Avenue?”

  • Ace McCloud®

    LMAO

  • Paul Abruzzo

    He’s on his way to being a businessman. He knows how he’s supposed to look, now he just has to work on his English.

  • NBAFan123

    Good one.