The Colorado Department of Corrections is now allowing inmates to grow and consume recreational marijuana, in accordance with state law for the rest of the population.
Prison Warden Tom Norton told the Rocky Mountain News, “We’ve already seen a decrease in violent crime within the jails. Snack food contraband is up 300 percent but that’s to be expected. We will continue to monitor the marijuana program but so far so good.”... Read More →
A protester in Ferguson, Missouri accidentally burned down his own house last night after mistaking the building for a convenience store.
According to a report in the Ferguson Post-Gazette, 32-year-old Tyler Jackson threw a Molotov cocktail into a window not realizing he was setting ablaze his own residence. The home, which was empty at the time, subsequently burned to the ground.... Read More →
Sarah Palin confused the city of Ferguson, Missouri with police officer Darren Wilson tonight on national television.
In an interview on Fox News, the former Alaska governor said she was happy that “Mr. Ferguson” was not indicted in the shooting of 18-year-old Michael Brown.... Read More →
Sarah Palin said today that illegal immigrants from Mexico should be put on boats and sent back across the ocean to their home country.
In an interview with Fox News tonight, the former Alaskan governor was asked about President Obama’s new plan to partially legalize some of the estimated 11 million illegal immigrants in America. Palin dismissed the president's idea as “amnesty” and offered an unconventional solution of her own.... Read More →
The state of North Dakota has named a new publicly-owned landfill after President Barack Obama.
In an overwhelming 35-10 vote, the state Senate advanced a bill naming a 650-acre site currently under construction after the nation’s 44th president. Governor Jack Dalrymple is expected to sign the measure into law Tuesday.... Read More →
After sweeping the midterm elections, Republican Mitch McConnell of Kentucky announced today the construction of a 2,000-square-foot gun range in the basement of the Capitol building in Washington, D.C.
In a speech to the National Rifle Association this morning, the next Senate majority leader told the crowd that the new project -- which will cost taxpayers $37 million -- will help secure America's Second Amendment rights.... Read More →
An active member of Al-Qaeda has been elected to a California city council in an election that saw a record low voter turnout.
Sidi Baba “Bob” Al-Booey, who campaigned under the slogan “Call me Bob” for an open city council seat in Agrestic in Los Angeles County with a tough-on-crime, family values platform that includes enacting Sharia law, received 54 percent. Only 21.5 percent of registered voters in the suburb of 5,300 voted in the election, keeping in line with low voter turnout in other communities throughout the region.... Read More →
California voters have overwhelmingly approved plans for a high-speed rail link to Hawaii.
According to election officials, Proposition 49 -- which would use public money to build a 2,600-mile-long undersea rail tunnel between Honolulu and Los Angeles -- passed with a resounding 78 percent of the vote.... Read More →
In response to the Republican takeover of the Senate, President Barack Obama has announced he will tour the country on a golfing trip until the end of his presidency.
“If this election has taught me one thing, it’s that I’ve grown deeply out of touch with the American people and what is going on in this country,” Obama said at a press conference as news poured in of Democratic losses. “Therefore, I’ve decided to leave the bubble of Washington and travel around this great country of ours, meeting with the people and getting back to my roots: as an avid golfer.”... Read More →
Voters in Oklahoma have narrowly rejected a proposal to institute Sharia law in their state.
According to election projections from CNN, Oklahoma Question 115 -- which would amend the state’s constitution to declare the supremacy of fundamentalist Islamic law -- went down tonight 50.4 percent to 49.6 percent in a surprisingly close ballot.... Read More →
Governor Chris Christie has cancelled trick-or-treating in the state of New Jersey this year out of fear of the Ebola virus.
According to local reports, this so-called “Halloween Quarantine” will be in effect Oct. 31 from 4 p.m. to 2 a.m. Children who violate the curfew orders will be arrested and their parents will face finds of up to $1,000.... Read More →
After years of record-low approval ratings, the U.S. Congress’s overall approval score has has finally inched past that of the deadly Ebola virus.
According to a survey of 5,000 Americans conducted by TDC Polling Research, 12.8 percent approved of the job that Congress is doing, compared to 11.7 percent who said they approved of Ebola.... Read More →
