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Drug Kingpins Thank U.S. Government at Annual Award Show

April 23rd, 2012

 

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The brightest lights in the international drug trafficking industry fêted their own last night at the star-studded Druggie awards in Panama City, Panama. The 3rd annual award show celebrated excellence and achievement in the field of global drug crime.

The notoriously territorial drug cartels put their differences aside once a year to celebrate the shared spoils of their $300 billion a year industry. Although the night's statuettes were widely spread between Latin American cocaine cartels and Old World heroin runners, the biggest star of the night was perhaps the U.S. government - whose opposition to sensible drug laws make brutal global drug syndicates possible.... Read More →

Mitt Romney Considering Dropping Out, Buying Canada Instead

March 28th, 2012

 

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Republican presidential contender Mitt Romney is said to be considering dropping out of the Republican nomination race for United States president, according to sources close to the former Massachusetts governor. Tentative reports out of the Romney camp indicate that the candidate has realized that despite the fact that he nearly has the nomination locked up,  it might be cheaper for him to simply buy the entire country of Canada and elect himself Prime Minister than it would be to continue on with an expensive American general election campaign.

... Read More →

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